On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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