so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
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