sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
my poor anus
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
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