They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Randomize
