Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
