You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
You dont lie about slip and slides
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize