You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
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