Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize
