I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
