Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
