I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
