felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
