I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Randomize