I wannas sexs uuuuu
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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