can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
