But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
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You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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