I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
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