using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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