I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
I have peed in a lot of sinks
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
