he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize