I think I won the penis lottery.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
I just found a bag of teeth...
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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