Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
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