real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
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