oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
