Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Randomize
