Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
