I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
Randomize
