Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
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