I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
Randomize
