Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
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