Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
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