she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
