I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Randomize
