VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
i will never coherently bang her
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Randomize
