her vagine was all disorganized.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Randomize
