So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
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