I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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