it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
