so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Randomize
