Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Randomize
