Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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