can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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