she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
