You know the @ sign on twitter? i wish there was one of those in real life so that the smokin' hot guy at the bar would know the slutty unbuttoning of my shirt was directed @ him, not @ his friend who looks like Mickey Rourke post-face melting
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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