then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Randomize
