just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
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