Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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