Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
