is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
no you cant smoke seaweed
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
