ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
Randomize
