He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Randomize
